I recently read a blogger (can’t remember who) wondering aloud about what would have happened if the blogging phenomenon had been around for earlier periods in our history.
Just what history needs: more Mickey Kaus.
(cue dream sequence)
I’m not sure why I have such a viceral loathing of Atticus Finch. Maybe it’s his perpetually sweaty brow. Maybe it’s his voice- low, slow, and phony. Maybe it’s the pale suits. Maybe it’s his hypocrisy; why is a man only scum if he takes advantage of a poor Negro? What’s so elevated about taking advantage of a poor white man? Can some reader help me out? 12:25 PM
Is Atticus Finch Jewish? This Macomb County Herald colum says that his great-grandfather on his mother’s side was a Jew. It also mentions that Finch never once contacted them to correct them when they said he had English ancestry. Does he know who he is? Father Coughlin has more. Developing… 2:40 PM
The Finch kids rolled their tire right onto the Radley’s property last week. Now they’re bothering the Radleys again. But it’s not as bad as I thought. It’s worse!The Radleys reported seeing an intruder in their cabbage patch last night. Nathan Radley scared off the intruder with a shotgun blast. Witnesses reported seeing a pair of britches caught on the fence, although no britches were found. No suspects have been announced, although the Finch children were allegedly seen in the vicinity by Mrs. Harris.
Sneaking into the cabbage patch? And these are the Finch children? Just imagine! 10:36 AM
FINCH TO THE DEFENSE! Atticus Finch has been appointed to defend Tom Robinson against the charge of attacking and raping Mayella Ewell. He’s arguing that Tom Robinson couldn’t have attacked Mayella Ewell like Bob and Mayella said (choking her with one hand, hitting her with the other) because he badly damaged his left hand in a cotton gin.
But did Tom Robinson really hurt his hand? Boy, Finch’s case would sure fall apart if it wasn’t true! And how, exactly, did Tom Robinson do all of this chopping one-handed? NEW PRO-FINCH SPIN: This big strong guy? He’s a creampuff. Trust me! 10:13 PM
Why did the AL Today spike Thomas “Too Far” Dixon’s column? If they hired him to cover the Robinson trial, what did they think they were going to get? True, his article, “Savage Negroes and the Threat to Our Women” was pretty strong stuff. But I would have printed it! 9:44 AM
Robinson Panic Watch: Some unnamed veteran journalist friends talked to some of the Ewell Kinfolk for Justice and found them much more credible than they expected. (Sorry, Mrs. Roosevelt!) They claim that Tom Robinson performed as a juggler at the Macomb County fair, six months after the alleged cotton gin incident. 11:20 AM
FINCH: BETTER FED BY REDS? Is Atticus Finch accepting food from the Communist Party of Alabama? All signs point to “yes”! (Ed. Like what? The day after his closing statement, Bob Ewell said that he was looking through Finch’s window, and it was full of food! The Reds have shown a lot of interest in this case…) 12:01 PM
Hello? Does Macomb County want to look at Jean Louise Finch parading around in a ham costume that Josephine Baker would be embarrassed to wear? Sources say that during the pageant, she lost her dress- and her shoes! What kind of a child loses her shoes?… P.S.: Could she be what these pictures suggest—a bit vain, selfish and opportunistic? She is a Finch, after all! … P.P.S.:The Negroes will love it, of course. But Finch already has their support. Maybe he’s energizing his base! 11:35 PM