See this… and more! Come to the red light district!
Who has the SPF 50?
Local Meerkat prepares warm nuts for the winter.
Pentagon discovers fiendish plot to hide WMDs inside meerkat
“Yeah, I got your beautiful Australian weather right here, buddy!”
…and Papa Meerkat assured his wife that their next son would be served by a better mohel.
“Ai, ai, ai, ai, stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive.” (…with a little meerkat booty boogie)
“We never use heat lamps at McMeerkat, where we don’t cook it ‘til you order it!”
Alternative: “I’m ready for my closeup, Mr. DeMeer.”
“No, no, see, she hit me first, officer. I was just sittin’ there, mindin’ my own, y’know, business, and she comes up behind me an’…what? Yeah, I’m drunk, so what? Crazy bitch gets to hit me on the head just ‘cause I’m drunk? Damn!”
I am the Lizard King! I can do ANYTHING!!!!
Alan Schussman beat me to my first choice (“I’m ready for my close-up…”), so I’ll suggest:
“I’m too sexy for this fur…I do my little walk on the (meer)kat-walk”
Ma’am please, I know what you’ve heard, but modesty forbids.
Celebrity I resemble most: Chewbacca
“I thought there was supposed to be PRIVACY in these nude tanning salons.”
“I’ve written the directions to the uranium cache here on my abdomen, in ink that only shows up under red light-… Oh, rats! Damn that social grooming!”
“Yeah? Well, don’t let the door hit ya on the way out! And make sure it’s shut this time!”
Or
“Nothin like warm toasty fur down below, eh Fred?”
“Mr. Attorney-General, I know nothing of any terrorist plot to collapse the Pentagon by burrowing underneath it.”
“A meerkat warms itself under the glow of a heat lamp in its enclosure at Taronga Zoo in Sydney, Thursday July 3, 2003. Weather officials say Sydney experienced its coldest maximum temperature in seven years, reaching 12 degrees Celcius (54 degrees Fahrenheit), prompting zoo keepers to activate the lamps to help warm the meerkats native to Angola, Namibia, South Africa and Southern Botswana.”
Oh shit, that was already taken.
“I keep telling you, I’m not the three of clubs!”
“Don’t Judge Me.”
Henry was often the first to arrive at the Yellowstone Disco.
I think red is my color, don’t you?
What, no “Lion King” references? Okay then…
“You don’t know what you’re missing, Pumbaa. This stuff rocks!”
Marina Kelinova, 25, poses outside the recently reopened Chernobyl branch of The Tanning Centre.
I’m too sexy for my hat, too sexy for my shirt, too sexy!!!
(Yeah, I’ll take that Lion King challenge.)
“Timon’s career having entered a downward spiral, it was not long before he found himself performing in ‘Serengeti Nasties’.”
Or:
“Exhibit ‘A’ in the case of The Crown v. David Attenborough”
Some days Kieran regrets leaving academia and assuming the form and simple lifestyle of a captive meerkat. But not today.
(Oh, wait. You’re an EU lobbyist or somesuch, aren’t you? Damn, that would have messed up my caption, since, really, what’s the difference?)
“So, didja hear the joke about the Finns in the sauna?”
Oh, wait. You’re an EU lobbyist or somesuch, aren’t you?
No, that’s Maria.
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