Burger Queen

by Kieran Healy on March 31, 2005

“Snort”:http://www.sumama.com/misc/911_tape.wma. (Via “Pangadon”:http://www.pandagon.net/mtarchives/004875.html).



Andrew 03.31.05 at 4:32 pm

Is that a joke? It’s hilarious anyway.


Kieran Healy 03.31.05 at 4:37 pm

No idea. Frankly, I hope it’s real.


joel turnipseed 03.31.05 at 5:04 pm

That is absolutely classic. When they dig up the remains of US civilization ten thousand years hence, I hope this is somehow preserved: Danny Hillis, are you reading this?


Keith M Ellis 03.31.05 at 5:08 pm

See snopes’s entry on this. But also follow the Pandagon link to see a comment that answers snopes’s chief doubt.


nolo 03.31.05 at 5:11 pm

snopes says the OC police department has confirmed that the tape is real. No one knows for sure if the woman was for real, though.


mikez 04.01.05 at 1:03 am

The woman is absolutely believable to me. People who have overblown self-importance and a sense proportion between themselves and society that is out of whack are a dime-a-dozen.

I recall three local incidents (but I’m not going to dig through local news archives for them):

1) A city council woman who called 911 because she needed her tire changed.

2) A woman who called 911 because a store refused to take a check.

3) A guy who called 911 because some other guy brought a dog into a restaurant and wouldn’t leave when asked. The guy with the dog was blind.


bad Jim 04.01.05 at 4:07 am

Urban Legends notes that the Orange County Sheriff’s Department contends that the tape is real, but that it happened two years ago.

I’m chagrined, because this happened just around the corner from me (or more precisely, just over the hill; I live a seaside city so privileged that our few fast-food joints are halfway out of town).

Unfortunately, the story’s entirely credible. My fellow citizens, reliably right-wing Republicans (though my exclusive enclave, Laguna Beach, is a notorious exception) are exactly this lazy, demanding, self-righteous and vapid.

Odds are, though, that you’ll find your neighbors about the same.


des von bladet 04.01.05 at 4:26 am

Persons unafflicted by players of the proprietary .wma format may find this transcription helpful:


(Of course, I can’t vouch for its accuracy.)


bad Jim 04.01.05 at 5:48 am

The young lady may have been a bit confused.

I’m not familiar with the Burger King (“have it your way”) menu, but Carl’s, Jr. has a Western Bacon Cheeseburger with two crossed bacon strips atop onion rings and a dollop of barbecue sauce.

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