by Belle Waring on March 31, 2004

Now that Easter is coming, it’s time to focus on what matters: Marshmallow Peeps. This special, nauseating American food product may be a more worthless candy than the apparently styrofoam-based Circus Peanuts. Nah, Peeps are #2; the Circus Peanuts are the worst. But did you know you can pay top dollar for gourmet passion-fruit flavored Peeps in NYC? Or that with a little Martha-like craftiness you can decorate an entire office with Peeps? Here’s my special fun-filled Peeps trick: put a marshmallow Peep in the microwave (on a plate) and set for one minute. It’s a flaming orgy of sadistic Peeps-destruction! Mel Gibson’s got nothing on me (though I doubt the edifying spectacle will cause anyone to confess to murder.)



justin 03.31.04 at 6:31 am

Just what I needed before bed- a sudden urge to gorge myself on Peeps. Thankfully there is not a cornershop in my neighborhood.


bad Jim 03.31.04 at 9:15 am

Nieces and nephews of mine continue to celebrate pagan holidays like Easter & Halloween by nuking marshmallows. The ensuing gooey concoction has substantial play value, it seems.


eszter 03.31.04 at 12:35 pm

You missed an important reference here: Peeps at the Library. I know about this because it relates to my research on how people find information online.. and so my friends have kindly forwarded the page to me in an attempt to further my research.:)


Mark Byron 03.31.04 at 1:15 pm

Reminds me of an old Robin Williams skit where he does Mr. Rodgers off his meds-“Let’s put Mister Hamster in the microwave…Pop goes the weasel!”

BTW, those peanuts aren’t made out of Styrofoam, since, last I checked, Dow Chemical only makes Styrofoam building products. There’s most likely made out of that famed punk frontwoman, Polly Styrene.


praktike 03.31.04 at 2:39 pm

Gee, and here I was wondering which candy I liked more, Peeps or Circus Peanuts…


Molly Moloney 03.31.04 at 3:48 pm

This reminded me of a great site that I hadn’t thought of since probably around this time last year: There you can ponder such questions as: “Could Venus be colonized by Peeps?,” discover what happens when you put Peeps in an autoclave, and find experiments that reslt in the conclusion that “Given enough time, the proper resources, and access to some really toxic stuff, one can probably dissolve just about anything except Peep eyes.” Of course it all uses the most rigorous scientific methods.


George Wallace 03.31.04 at 4:37 pm

My former mother-in-law had a fondness for Peeps. Also a fondness for Cutty Sark blended scotch. At Easter time, she would frequently remind us of a frightening culinary equation:

Peeps + Cutty = Putty


Tom 03.31.04 at 6:23 pm

Let me ask this of the UK-to-US transplant CTimberites; Is it just me, or is American Candy totally disgusting?

Hershey bars are wax with food colouring compared to Cadbury’s, and the form of the chocolate is boring (no equivalent of a Flake, Aero or Wispa). Nothing like a Lion Bar or a Picnic or a Boost. See’s is OK, but give me a decent Fruit n’ Nut. It’s telling that Cadbury’s is marketed in the US as an upmarket chocolate bar.

No Fruit Pastilles or Wine Gums, instead gummi bears which stick to your teeth so you’re trying to pry the remnants out with your tongue for the next hour.

So, why haven’t the European confectionery makers wiped the floor with the mediocre American manufacturers??

(I guess there is the question of distribution; the US doesn’t have newsagents with tempting morsels of chocolate and sweets, but instead you buy the stuff in a Walgreen’s or a supermarket.)


Andrew Case 03.31.04 at 7:04 pm

tom asks “Is it just me, or is American Candy totally disgusting? ”

American Candy is unbelievably crappy compared to that in the UK. There’s niche products which are pretty good, but the mass market stuff is horrible – all sugar and no flavor. For some reason the UK seems to have far superior mass market candy. If I had to guess, I’d say it has to do with the relative availability of high fructose corn syrup, which is dirt cheap over here and makes its way into just about everything. Just a guess, though.


Brad 03.31.04 at 7:16 pm

Hahaha… hearing the English complain about how gross American candy makes this little bit of Gravity’s Rainbow come irresistably to mind.


eszter 03.31.04 at 7:27 pm

Let me ask this of the UK-to-US transplant CTimberites; Is it just me, or is American Candy totally disgusting?

I’m a transplant from another part of Europe and I’ll say the candy and especially chocolate certainly leaves room for something better. If you look at the contents of the luggage I just brought back from Budapest, you’ll see that sweets are one of the things I miss the most. That said, I think one can get used to candy and chocolate in the US if few alternatives are accessible in any easy manner. *sniff*

That said, many people here (US) tend to love some of the candies available here and don’t necessarily like what’s a big hit elsewhere (I base that on people’s reactions when I give them to-me-marvelous candies from Hungary). That’s been my impression, but that’s all based on anecdotal evidence.


novalis 03.31.04 at 7:58 pm

Trader Joe’s sells bars of Valrhona for about $4. A bar (100g, 3.5 oz) is so intense that you eat about 1/3rd as much as you would of other chocolates. And unlike most other chocolates, it’s not made with slave labor.

If you don’t mind slave labor (and I have discovered that at ~7x the price, I sometimes can’t bring myself to buy Valrhona), TJ’s also has a house brand, from Belgium. $3.29 buys an excellent 70% dark bar of 500g (a bit over a pound). This chocolate is also quite intense, but not quite as good as the Valrhona. Still, it’s head and shoulders above Hershey.


Another Damned Medievalist skiving off from course proposals 03.31.04 at 9:50 pm

Circus peanuts evil — does does anyone really buy them?

Peeps in anything but white or yellow (maybe the pink bunnies) evil.

Fresh peeps evil

Peeps left to get just a bit stale and chewy? Easter heaven.

US candy is awful. German candy is much better, but I can’t stand Milka, Cadbury, or any non-dark chocolate.

Trader joe’s Terra Nostra Organic chocolate is pretty good, too. See’s is wonderful. If you’re in Seattle, Chocolati (on Aurora and 77Th?) does this amazing trufful calles a Chocolate Aztec — cinnamon and hazelnuts — women I know make little whimpering sounds when they eat them!


Rana 03.31.04 at 9:56 pm

I love peeps (yellow chicks only, please) and chocolate. There is good chocolate in the US, but you have to look for it. See’s anyone? Godiva? Ghiradelli? Andes thin mints are also quite delish, and I admit a weakness for gummy bears.

Other candies are pretty gross — lots of sour and crunchy things — but I don’t know that the US has a lock on bad candy. I remember some pathetic Panamanian chocolate (called “Jet”) and some scary _musk_-flavored Australian things.

Circus peanuts are foul. (Sorry, praktike)


old maltese 03.31.04 at 11:05 pm

Bet you don’t know with what flavor Circus Peanuts are infused.

While you think about it, I’ll spell it backwards: ananab. It’s true.


memfree 03.31.04 at 11:18 pm

My favorite peeps page: (alas, it hasn’t been updated this year). I liked the gallery for a couple years, but now there’s just so *many* pictures.

Comments on this entry are closed.